The worst sports villains ever

I love top 5 and 10 lists, and earlier today I came up with an idea - the top 10 most evil sports figures. Obviously I wasn't alive when some of these people were around, so some of this is based on reputation. I also tried to include only athletes who were/are at least fairly well-known. Here we go:

10. Roger Clemens - What a snake. Anyone who follows baseball at all knows he did steroids, but more than that, how could he throw his wife under the bus during in front of Congress to save his own neck? In addition, he's an unabashed head-hunter and may have very well slept with a 15-year-old girl.

9. Ty Cobb - Unapologetic racist who used to sharpen his spikes in plain view in order to better cut up opponents.

8. Marge Schott - Former Cincinnati Reds owner kept a swastika armband in her house and referred to some of her black players as million-dollar n***ers. A fan of Hitler, Schott was upset when umpire John McSherry collapsed on the field and later died on opening day,because the umpires had the gall to postpone the game.

7. Lawrence Phillips - Former Nebraska standout assaulted his girlfriend in college, but he wasn't nearly done. In '05, Phillips ran his car into three teenagers after a dispute and was eventually convicted on seven counts of assault with a deadly weapon.

6. Pacman Jones - Spitting on and hitting women are just the start. The Las Vegas shooting case Jones was involved in led to one man being paralyzed.

5. Ugueth Urbina - Urbina went after workers on his farm - with a machete - because he believed they stole a gun from his house. A machete.

4. Mel Hall - The former Yankee outfielder was convicted of having sex with several minors and is serving 45 years in prison. Rot away, Mel.

3. Mike Danton - I didn't know much about about this former member of the St. Louis Blues until I did a little research for this post. He tried to have his agent murdered. Enough said.

2. Rae Carruth - Arranged a drive-by shooting of a woman pregnant with his child. Only one guy could top this...

1. O.J. Simpson - We all know he stabbed two people to death, one of whom had young children sleeping upstairs while Simpson was murdering her. He then committed a robbery at gunpoint which finally landed him where he always belonged - prison. He also pleaded no contest to a domestic violence charge in 1989. Good guy.

My fav 5...people to hate

5. Tony Romo: Has anyone ever received more attention without winning a playoff game? Even the criminals, the overexposed and the egomaniacs like Michael Vick, Terrell Owens, Peyton and Eli Manning, Tom Brady, Jerry Jones, Bill Parcells, etc. have won something — most of them oodles of playoff games and Super Bowls, Vick included. So why has this Cowboy quarterback been cast as a star right alongside them? Because he dated a hot babe who was famous? Last time I checked, Giselle was neither ugly nor obscure.

Look, Romo has produced at the level of a top 10 regular season quarterback. Fair, but big whoop. Show his mug after an accomplishment, ESPN, not after a weekend in Cancun.

I also greatly dislike his face.

4. Chris Berman: Hey, I have a nickname there guy: Chris "STFU" Berman.

So please stay away from the U.S. Open and the MLB playoffs. They are legitimate events. And burn that stupid hat.

3. Joe Buck: Besides the fact that his cavernous cleft could sleep a family of four comfortably, Buck is a truly perplexing figure. Let's consider other sports broadcasters who have dominated the sports landscape over the last generation: Marv Albert (NBA/NFL), Bob Costas (MLB/NBA/Sunday Night Football/Olympics), Jim Nantz (NFL/PGA), and Al Michaels (Monday Night Football/MLB/NBA/Hockey). Those four men would consist of the sports broadcasting Mount Rushmore from the last 25 years.

So question: Who among this group does the vast majority of the American public actively despise? Their only faults are the following — Nantz is a little rehearsed, Costas a little smug, Michaels a little GPS (see Rip-tionary) on the rules, and Marv a little... well... promiscuous. But have we ever really hated them? No.

Personally, I find Buck detestable. Many agree. 

2. Isiah Thomas: Because anyone with his history of transgressions deserves nothing but a rip! He has, in rough order: bankrupt the CBA; destroyed the rosters of the Raptors and Pacers; decimated and humiliated the Knicks, all while sapping their fan base of whatever remained of its pride; sexually harassed a co-worker; possibly threw his daughter under the bus; and somehow came out smelling at least a little like a rose.

Seriously though, FIU hiring Isiah as its coach is the sports equivalent of giving Bernie Madoff a job as a stock broker if he was ever discharged from jail. 

And I think that's what why Zeke is so easy to hate. His punishments/banishments/disgrace-aments never last long. Ol' No. 11 woos more people than Ben Franklin in his prime.

1. Roger Clemens: Nothing repulses an honest sports fan more than someone who is: A) self-

obsessed; B) has no understanding of his current place in his sport (see: Iverson, Allen); and C) is a filthy liar. Clemens manages to combine A, B and C, and somehow still maintain enough in his deep reserve of gall to attach his wife's name to steroid use.

How crazy is Clemens? This crazy: I don't think the best way to dagger him is to keep him out of Cooperstown. Instead, here's my idea...

How about the voters select him. Then, on his big day in rural New York, with Debbie and the K-clan watching, they consistently mispronounce his name at the ceremony. Then, once the time comes, the Hall misspells his name on his plaque.

With someone so undeniably vain and deranged, nothing would sting him more.