Tears of a clown, or clowns

Listen closely. That uncontrollable sobbing you hear is coming from the corner known as the national football media. This group of Not Woodwards and Not Bernsteins was dealt a mighty blow right around midnight when the Steelers lost to the Ravens 20-17 in OT thanks to an interception by Dennis Dixon.

Now, Dixon, in his first NFL start, filled in for Big Ben, who, going against the desire of some people he should never again consider friends, managed to wait at least one more week before putting his mental well-being on the line. Good for him. Good for Dixon, too. He played admirably, if a little uninspiring. Even though he lost the game — and don't get it twisted, he did — this rip is not for him. No, we devote this space to the poor boys who are unable to waive their Terrible Towels this morning.

Just imagine: Joe Flacco throws a pick, Rashard Mendenhall runs for a couple of first downs, Jeff Reed kicks an OT field goal and Pittsburgh wins. Would Dixon even have room to walk with all the knee-pad jobs given to him by the national football media? Game-manager. Stepped up. Cheered on every step of the way by the starter. All the cliches these clowns love were there. It had the potential to be a nauseating Monday.

We still may hear enough to get the bile bubbling in our stomachs. Take Cris Collinsworth, Mr. Buckner's boy, who raved about Dixon during his postgame thoughts. Wait, isn't Dixon the same player who tossed a pass directly into the hands of a Ravens' defender in overtime? Yes. Yes, he is.

Not to be mean, but I'm sorry folks. You cannot throw an interception that leads almost immediately to the winning score and have played well. That's like Tim McCarver saying Bill Buckner had a good World Series in '86.

Anyway, this speaks to a larger point about the national football media. Unlike in baseball or basketball where the narratives change, they never do in football. A numbers of these clowns still trumpet Shawne Merriman as a "great" defensive player. They wondered earlier this season when the Chargers' LB would pick it up. ... Hmmm. Tough question. Maybe when he starts using whatever he used in 2006 again.

Bottom line: National football media — get out.

Ripping ourselves

I want to apologize for being a little light on content this weekend. In a stroke of bad luck we all got bogged down in that pesky thing they call life. No excuses, just an explanation.

However, I can promise the ripping will be stronger than ever this week. The list of potential rippees is long and juicy.

Stay tuned.

Morris miscue

The Falcons-Bucs game might not have been one of Week 12's marquee matchups, but I'm going to write about it for two reasons:

1) I was there
2) Raheem Morris gave me material for a rip

Fans who saw highlights know that Chris Redman (filling in for the injured Matt Ryan) hit Roddy White on fourth-and-goal from the five with 26 seconds left in the game. Had the Bucs made a stop on that play, they would have won.

But what will never get mentioned is that there was a play two minutes earlier that also would have won the game for Tampa. The problem is, Morris didn't allow his team the opportunity to win.

Leading 17-13, Tampa had the ball on Atlanta's 33-yard line with 2:30 left and faced a fourth and four. Morris elected to try a 51-yard field goal. Wrong decision.

If Tampa makes the field goal, Atlanta gets the ball back trailing 20-13 with 2:20 left at whatever field position it would get following the kickoff.

If Tampa misses the field goal, Atlanta gets the ball back trailing 17-13 on its own 41. (That's what happened, and the Falcons ended up driving down the field for the winning score.)

What Morris should have done is tried for the first down. If Tampa makes the first down, assuming the play didn't end out of bounds, the game is over. Tampa qb Josh Freeman would just have to take a knee three times.

Assuming the probability of making a fourth-and-4 is similar to that of making a 51-yard field goal Morris made a misguided decision.

The benefit of making the first down is infinitesimally better than making the field goal (a guaranteed win vs. a 7-point lead with 2:20 left) and the downside of failing to convert wasn't as bad (opposition gets the ball trailing by four at its own 33 compared to its own 40). And even if a 51-yard field goal is more likely, it certainly doesn't make up for giving up an opportunity to end the game.

Another NFL Sunday. Another blunder by a clueless head coach. And this one may have cost his team the game.

ACC = A Collection of Crap

Here's a college football game I won't be watching: Next week's ACC "Championship" -- Georgia Tech vs. Clemson.

Good job by these two programs against their in-state rivals today. Georgia Tech lost 30-24 to Georgia; Clemson lost to South Carolina 34-17.

What does this say about the ACC? The championship game is going to be played between two schools that couldn't even beat two mediocre teams from the SEC.

I don't want to sound like an SEC booster. But I'm perfectly fine with being an ACC basher. The ACC likes to fancy itself as more than just a powerful basketball conference. It shouldn't put its 2009 results on its resume for that claim.

Sports Rippers influence

After saying he was planning to play despite suffering a concussion last weekend, Big Ben will in fact sit this weekend against the Ravens. I posted previously that the Steelers should not let him play, and obviously they read the blog and reconsidered.

Some may ask if it's a bad thing for sports that our blog has such influence over these franchises and the decisions they make. I can't answer that, all I can do is try to give them the best advice possible and let them do with it what they will.

Although it may scare some people to see a blog with such pull, I can promise you will do our best never to abuse this power.

Time to call it quits

Shaq has been one of my favorite athletes since he burst on the scene with Orlando years ago. As much as it pains me to say this, it's time for the big man to retire.

The Cavs lost to the lowly Bobcats tonight, dropping their record to 6-4 with O'Neal in the lineup. Cleveland is 5-1 without Shaq. The Big Aristotle is a solid 50 lbs. overweight, slow and a shell of his former self as a player.

Bringing Shaq in was probably Cleveland's attempt to show LeBron it's committed to providing him with a supporting cast good enough to win a title. Unfortunately, Shaq isn't really any better than the big men the Cavs had last year.

So, Big Luggage, I'm pleading with you - don't hang on for years after your prime and force us to watch you bumble around clumsily under the basket. We've seen too many elite athletes play until they're so ineffective they have to retire because nobody wants them.

Please, Wilt Chamberneezy, don't let this be you.

Ugly Ending In Sight

All those times the NCAA has avoided potential problems with its archaic way of setting a national champion in football have apparently added up to one colossal debacle. Enter 2009: The Year Of The Disaster.

At this very moment there are six (six!!!) teams that are still undefeated as we approach the final stretch of the regular season. Last time I checked, in a bowl game only two can play each other at one time.

Look, we've heard the argument for a playoff for years, but it's not an argument anymore. It's simply a statement of logic.

Virtually every other sport has some kind of season-ending tournament to crown a champion and why college football, one of this country's top draws for more than a century, still doesn't is absolutely ridiculous.

We've heard the laughable excuses of the wear and tear of a longer season and the claim the students would miss too much class time if they had to play a few extra games (I guess they haven't heard of shortening the regular season to compensate). Yet somehow, March Madness for college basketball is so long that it lasts into April.

Obviously, the reason for the way things are all revolves around the big bucks that the bowl games pull in, but it's not like a playoff system wouldn't generate any money (See the aforementioned college basketball). I don't have any projected numbers, but something tells me there would be just a little interest generated by a tournament on top of the endless wave of mainly meaningless bowl games.

Alabama and Florida will get their shot to earn their way into the title game when they square off in the SEC Championship, but for the rest of these teams, their fates rely on a bunch of computer nerds. The BCS is a much better system than what was in place before when undefeated teams didn't necessarily play each other due to conference obligations, but it's true acronym should be "Belies Common Sense."

Boise State's epic win over Oklahoma in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl proved teams from non BCS conferences can play with the big boys. Utah's thrashing of Alabama in last year's Sugar Bowl proved they can contend for a national championship.

Utah didn't get its chance to play for a title despite finishing the season as the country's only undefeated team. How many teams will suffer the same injustice this year?

Season over

R.I.P. Giants. Unless we see a miracle, the 2009-2010 is dead and gone. First the defense fell apart, now the offense is emitting a stench.

Brandon Jacobs looks completely shot. The offensive line looks old and slow, and the entire defense just can't make a big stop. After a 5-0 start during which the Giants looked like a legitimate juggernaut, they appear to be nothing more than a mediocre team.

After a disastrous season for the Mets, this is crushing for me and anyone else who roots for the Mets-Giants combo. I may have to give up sports and start a blog called The Opera Rippers.

Use your head

Despite sustaining his 4th concussion in as many years last weekend, Ben Roethlisberger is planning to play in the Steelers' game against Baltimore Sunday night. He's back at practice just days after his latest head injury.

I admire Big Ben. He's a tough guy and an excellent player. He plays QB in an unorthodox way, holding onto the ball forever and shirking tacklers before letting go of the ball. Can't argue with his results.

But the Steelers should not let him play this week - plain and simple.

I understand Roethlisberger wants to do the courageous thing, but head injuries are not to be fooled around with. The NFL is making changes to its concussion panel and increasing research into the long-term effects of concussions, but as of right now, the onus falls on the Steelers.

I'm sure Big Ben, whose career survived a bad motorcycle accident already, feels indestructible, as any 6-5, 240 lb. QB would. We can't expect a 27-year-old elite athlete to think about what could happen 25 years down the line. He needs someone to look out for him.

NFL owners love to talk about how the franchises are big families, and about how much they love their players. If the Steelers feel this way about their QB, they should force him to take a seat this week.

Good riddance

Allen Iverson has released a statement announcing his retirement from the NBA.

I know we've done a lot of A.I. bashing on this site, and if you're tired of it....too freakin bad. Here's part of Iver-lost's statement:

"I always thought that when I left the game, it would be because I couldn't help my team the way that I was accustomed to. However, that is not the case."

Does Iverson really think he's the best guy to determine his worth as a player? At what point would he actually admit he can't help a team win or play at a high level? Here's a hint - never.

A.I. was always a selfish ball-hog, now with diminished skills he doesn't have much value. He just refuses to see it.

What really bothers me is the way the media portrays Iverson. ESPN analysts call him an all-time great, and many others follow suit. I don't get it. Teams he's played for have consistently gotten better when he leaves. Did the Celtics get better when Bird left? The Bulls with Jordan? The Rockets with Hakeem?

He's shot a miserable percentage from the floor and was never a good defender. His postseason shooting percentage is even worse than the regular season, at a meaty 40 percent. Maybe he could have used a little more PRACTICE. PRACTICE? PRACTICE.

I understand he had some great highlight moments, but he wasn't a great player, I don't care how many guys wearing expensive suits on TV say he was. I would argue he's one of the most overrated players in all of sports.

This is one of the huge problems with sports media today, particularly ESPN. These analysts want to be buddy-buddy with the athletes, so they endlessly pump them up, regardless of how valuable they really are. So the ESPN guys might make a few new friends, but with me, they've lost all credibility.

Just like Iverson.